green to 100

For the record –

Friday, February 27, 2016

I know I swore not to complain about February.

But the last think I want to do is ride in this crap one more day!

Of course it’s the day we have to ride.

So we ride.

This month has continued with less than ideal riding conditions. I am thankful for some of the mild temps earlier on and the mileage we’ve racked up toward our first ride which is coming up fast (Leatherwood, Saturday March 26). We are now less than one month out!

Does it make me a little nervous to take such a conditioning back seat a month before our first ride of the season?

Yep.

Do I have faith that we’ve worked really hard and done our best and stand a good shot at finishing healthy?

Also yep.

This winter has been one of a lot of growth for me in my journey to our 100 mile goal which in the larger picture (I hope) means a journey to being a horseman.

I started with the simple hope of becoming a better rider, and being more reflective this month pulling together the different threads of learning I’ve been working on- I remember going to see Pam over the summer for help in better posting my horse’s big trot.

She was gracious enough to invite me to come over and see what she could do. Again- I wanted to ride better.

What has come back to mind this winter was one of the first questions she asked me. It was in a discussion of what I hoped to accomplish.

I hope to work up to a 100 mile endurance ride… however I’ve never had a non-gaited horse and I am terrible at trotting and if we start with some introductory limited distance rides this year I’m going to be a mess out there if I can’t learn to ride this horse. Also, she’s young and learning to carry a human- I don’t want to mess her up!

Then Pam asks what my biggest concern is about achieving our goals. Aside from, and even second to, my physical riding inexperience I remember saying:

I want her to enjoy doing endurance with me. It’s a hard sport and takes a lot of physical stamina and I don’t want her to burn out and hate it. I want her to enjoy going to rides with me.

I want to cheer my last year self just a little because even then- before I really knew what I was getting into- in my heart I was trying to put my horse first.

When I began my ‘starting’ process I used a lot of Monty Roberts online videos and I feel they helped me get a good foundation with Khaleesi.

This year I’ve added some more hero mentors to my ‘team’ as I’ve been watching as much Buck Brannaman as possible, reading Sally Swift’s Centered Riding, and recently doing some interactive online work through Simple Equine Teaching with Dee Janelle.

My number one priority is to truly put my horse first and have a solid relationship with her. This has taken a lot of exploration for me because I am not sure I understand how a horse sees the world and thinks.

I’m not always successful, sometimes I fail her, and she always forgives my mistakes. How many times can she forgive me? I’m sure at some point I’m going to screw up again!

Yesterday with some barn time and a short muddy-wet walk together I thought about our relationship and how connected we are. Even though I don’t always know what I’m doing, even though I sometimes let my goal driven human clock watching mind get us off-kilter, she still comes to wait for me at the gate every time. She walks up behind me and offers her nose into my rope halter and walks next to me with her head at my shoulder, ears up and forward, like we are the kings of the world on our way to the barn.

What I’m beginning to think is there is a difference between a mistake and betrayal. I’ve made a lot of mistakes on my journey but one thing I hope I have never done- and never will- is betray her. Sometimes I ask her to do things she doesn’t feel like… Sometimes we argue about which direction to go… But we still work together like any solid relationship.

So what is a betrayal to a horse?

I am not ready to define that. Maybe it’s not so simple to put a definition on what that is. But in my gut I feel like it exists and it has to do with a breaking of their trust in you in a way that is not the same as a mistake along the way. It’s something bigger and deeper.

Anyway… I’m enjoying the SET lessons lately and I’ll share a few things from there I’m working out in our world right now.

*Relationship.

Everything we do will be better if we are in agreement. This is the root. Any question that comes up can be framed into ‘does it improve our relationship or degrade it?’ And then answered accordingly.

Of course- it gets more complicated at times how to answer that from the perspective of the horse.

*Time.

Horses don’t do clocks. It takes the time it takes. Accepting that is always going to make for a stronger relationship and more success (whatever that means to you). Rushing a horse is always ‘force’ and never gets a good result. This is in the short term (loading on the trailer, or training to stand at the mounting block) and the long term (anything that is a longer training goal… For faygo it might be overcoming her fear of the clippers)

*Balance.

I always strive for balance. Not always successfully. I’ve been working with the (SET) concept of a triangle representing the 3 components of a horse and human: mental (at the top), emotional and physical. All 3 need need to be healthy in both the horse and human.

It’s always fascinating to me how the horses mirror us. This is especially visible in the emotional side- horses are not naturally emotional beings. It takes a human who is emotional to push that side out of balance and create an emotional horse.

In fact if you watch horse herds in the wild, the horses are balanced on their own. We humans have a responsibility in bringing them into our worlds to work at achieving and maintaining balance for us and them as much as possible.

Mental comes first. Horses think and reason much like people. You must be able to communicate to the horse in a way they understand and you want your horse to have a positive opinion of you- Dee Janelle says that a horse who has formed a positive opinion of its owner is easy to train and willing. That makes perfect sense to me- this also means a safe horse which for me is a high priority. It should come first before anything else.

The emotional is next. Horses who have handlers that tend to get emotional often realize when a potentially emotional situation arises and will look to the handler to see if he/she will get emotional- especially if the handler has a mental connection to the horse. If the human refuses to engage emotionally the horse will relax and calm instead of amping up.

Humans with a tendency to get emotional will do better if they work on balancing their own triangle and checking in on their emotions while working with the horse. The emotional horse is created by humans and it’s our job as humans to help rebalance them as well as ourselves.

I find that fear tends to be the biggest trigger in emotional reactions but frustration is probably a close second. High adrenaline is always the enemy… When I start this cycle I turn to singing. It changes my breathing and distracts (and reminds) me bringing me back to calm and fair (which a horse understands better).

The last part of the triangle is the physical. Many humans gravitate to physical training/conditioning first – but a horse who doesn’t have mental connection and positive emotions towards its handler will not be willing and easy to train which sets you up for a battle instead of working together with common purpose. Humans who start with physical training don’t pay attention to what the horse is thinking and feeling along the way and the horse is more likely to shut down to protect itself.

For every thought or emotion a horse experiences, there is a physical behavior associated that we can identify. (Dee Janelle)

Horses developed with emphasis on positive mental and emotional selves first are bright, alert- with good muscling, well conditioned and are easy to train. They use their bodies well and are in balance.

****Spirit…….

This is my most recent concept. The last part of the horse is their spirit and a recent podcast (SET) made me think about this more specifically. This part we do not have access to- you cannot take or train the spirit- of a horse or anyone. But the idea that horses chose sometimes to willingly give their spirit to their human in a bond like no other is quite something to consider.

This is the horse that is not just doing her job well, but gives everything to the human they have connected with.

I don’t think this is all that common- but I believe I’ve seen it. At least one time last summer- and I wrote about it briefly in a blog post.

In the end isn’t this what we truly want with our horses? Maybe not for some. It takes a lot of dedication to make that connection: a lot of time and trust and positive work, play and love. The kind of love that sacrifices our needs for theirs.

Maybe I am the only one in the world that is better at the kind of love that is good at giving what I want to give– what I would like to get back that says ‘love’ to me. In human and horse relationships. I am not naturally gifted at seeing the world through others’ eyes… Not my husband, not my horse’s. I suppose realizing this is the first step- trying is the next.

I have to find out what is important to my horse- what her mental, emotional and physical needs are. In thinking through, this concept is bigger than horses. Maybe I can do this better in all aspects of my life.

In the end, back to our ride together yesterday, I recalled a blog post recently when I questioned our relationship. It is good to investigate and question.

Today I believe it is strong and healthy. We may not always agree, but we respect each other and I know she enjoys my company- she shows it. I love that.

This is how I develop an endurance horse who doesn’t burn out, who gives me her all and enjoys the ride. I put her needs first and keep our relationship strong.

And maybe… When we are ready… She will chose to trust me with her spirit. Though the idea of that responsibility is a little scary too.

Deal or No Deal

Monday, February 15, 2015

I have been reading The Horse (Epic History of our noble companions) by Wendy Williams. A much more fascinating read than I anticipated, one chapter features a horseman that takes in last chance mustangs who haven’t done well in more than one adoptive home.

He said (paraphrasing): you have to look at connecting with horses (especially wild ones) like Deal or No Deal. If you reach out and they turn away- and you continue into their space it’s just considered impatient [rude] behavior. But if you reach for them and they reach for you- then you have a deal. They are cooperating with you.

We have more winter weather this week and riding is out for a few more days, but that doesn’t mean we’re not working.

I’ve subscribed to Simple Equine Teaching with Dee Janelle. The basis of everything in her mentoring program comes from the relationship with the horse.

Without that you have nothing.

A recent lesson had to do with what is considered force to a horse. There are obvious things like tying, or pain (whipping), but what about a halter? That is also force- it confines the horse’s freedom and takes away her choice. What about blanketing? That is confining to their movement- they could consider that to be force.

[I am not starting a blanket debate or suggesting there is a right or wrong blanket program for anyone else’s horse by the way- that is not the point].

The horse can choose to participate with us- for example, when I go to bring my horses in, they usually come to me and lower their heads into the rope halter.

Deal.

But I was fascinated by her blanket logic. Dee said that she allows her horses to choose the blanket or not. “I just put the front closures together to make a hole for their heads, and hold it up [I’m picturing bull fighting style here]- the horses that want to be blanketed put their heads in and if they don’t they walk away. Their choice.”

Ok. I am not a regular blanketer. There are usually 2-3 occasions through the entire winter where I will blanket. I’ve seen my old mare covered in sleet and ice and shivering looking half alive after a terrible storm and it breaks my heart. So if we’re expecting something out of the ordinary – extreme for us- I will pull out the blanket even if it is so I sleep better that night. I never thought my horse had the foresight to choose to blanket or not. I am the one with a weather app on my phone last I checked.

Last blanket (storm weekend) Khaleesi nipped in the air at me and was less than cooperative. Since I blanket so infrequently I chalked it up to her not being used to it.

Hmmm. If Dee is right, Khaleesi was talking to me.

No Deal.

Experiment time came right away. I had to leave town for the weekend as we were expecting our coldest days this winter. Highs in the single digits and windchill in the -20 possible overnights. In VA, even in the mountains, that is unusually cold.

I was leaving Friday while the temps were still normal cold (20s). But Dee persisted: animals know what the weather is bringing. Better than we do.

I brought both blankets and no lead ropes/halters. I didn’t do the hold up and put the head in trick because I’d never tried it before and wasn’t sure if they’d know what I meant. But I did put the blanket on slowly one step at a time. I know my horses can communicate if they are happy or not.

Faygo stood while I blanketed her and seemed fine with the idea. Deal.

Khaleesi said No Deal.

She nipped in my direction and tried to step away. I took the blanket off and said:

Ok- you know best. I’m sure you’ll be fine. I respect your choice not to use a blanket.

And I left.

When I returned on Sunday, the weather was calling to get worse. We were now expecting sleet, snow and freezing rain. I went to visit the girls and they were acting frisky. Even I could feel the change in the air.

I brought some grain and Khaleesi’s blanket. I can assure you she doesn’t care enough for grain to let me blanket her if she doesn’t want to. She will still nip toward me and walk away (to faygos bowl for sure!) so the grain was not a bribe and she was eating on Friday when I tried to blanket her as well- the day she clearly said No Deal.

I walked up and showed her the blanket. She smelled it and went back to eating. I walked over to her fully expecting she would side step- she stood like a statue. I set the folded half onto her rump. Not a twitch. I unfolded it onto her back and she didn’t move or nip toward me. I adjusted it to be sure. Nothing. Finally I reached under her and around her chest to buckle it up. No question she would normally have no trouble nosing me or nipping at the air. Not a sign.

Deal.

Both girls blanketed after the storm had hit- it will be a two day event.

I was honestly amazed. In the past if I wanted to blanket her I would have never gone without a halter. I always assumed I’d have to tie her to get it on.

She was communicating with me and I’d just ignored her because “I knew best“.

There are times when she might just have to “Deal” because we have no choice… A vet needs her to stand still or we have to go for a ride and she needs her saddle on… She doesn’t want to go that way on the trail. She might say she doesn’t like it but I’ll have to override her. Sometimes I DO know best.

However, if I want to have a good relationship and for her to have a positive opinion of me- and I do because I need to trust her with my life and safety- then maybe I need to start trying to understand her better.

Maybe sometimes I can respect her wishes (no blanket is a pretty easy one to start with), and then she might compromise with me when I have to insist on my way. Maybe I can work with her without losing my leader status. I can’t truly ‘force’ her to respect me- you can only force someone to fear you – and even then it’s questionable.

I want my horse to have a high opinion of me. A good opinion of me. I do not want her to fear me, but to respect me. That means I have to be worthy of that respect somehow. This means I have to try to see things from her perspective.

Today I went out in the snow to feed some grain. Then I walked up to the hay bale to inspect it- all good- and down to the water – also all good.

Then I decided to take a walk around the field and see what would happen. The horses had followed me to the hay and were munching. They seemed to ignore me. I walked all the way to the far end of the field and once I got there I turned to see them (Khaleesi leading the way) coming over to follow me. Curious as to what I was doing.

  I stayed there as they approached. Khaleesi walked right up to me and sniffed my shoulder. I reached back to scratch her neck and she came closer.

Deal.

She continued to follow me as I wandered in the field. Faygo just behind- if Faygo got too close to me Khaleesi would chase her off to keep some distance.

She was like my shadow- just at my shoulder.

It was nice to just walk around with them at liberty in their own space. I loved that they chose to spend time with me. After a while I was getting cold and damp from the snow- time for me to go.

She then followed me all the way back to the gate and stood at the fence watching as I drove away.

Definitely Deal.

R&R

Friday, February 12, 2016

After racking up almost 50 miles last week on Khaleesi – we took advantage of mild weather and some available time that doesn’t always come so easily… This week is for some healing and recovery.

It’s the perfect week for it because the weather has turned winter with a vengeance. Cold wind, snow flurries and temps this weekend that will dip into negative territory and highs in single digits.

I’ve always been told that rest is more important than most riders believe and to work hard to find the balance between metabolically fit without overstrssing tendons, ligaments and bones to the edge of injury.

So I visit to feed and put some energy into other things in my life that need some attention. If the weather stays bad next week will will just stick to some relationship and training at home time.

We could all use some down time here and there.

Meanwhile we did a little photo shoot with the Knotty Pony rope halters that I am LOVING!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Excellent Together

Sunday, February 7, 2016

I arrived at the barn hoping for two things.

#1 that Khaleesi wasn’t lame or off from her kicking/slipping episode.

#2 that she wouldn’t walk away from me to show she was looking for that ever elusive relationship ‘space’ when things aren’t going so well.

When I pulled in the girls were about half way down the field perusing for any grass that might have popped up.

When I finished making their lunch and walked out (when I’d usually see them waiting at the gate) they were now 3/4 of the way down the field.

I knew it.

However as I walked toward their field they decided to mosey slowly toward me and the gate.

Maybe it’s not so bad as all that… She seems to be coming in.

Not only did she seem to say – sure I forgive you for being such a goal driven short sighted human, I’m a horse, generous in spirit, and live in the moment— but I also watched her walk in without any sign of being off. She was ready to go mentally and physically.

Today we were meeting a local endurance rider who rides much faster than we do. We’d exchanged enough emails for her to know what to expect from us – including kahleesi’s average speeds.

If we didn’t slow her race bred Arab up too badly, it would be great to make a new friend. Someone to help motivate Khaleesi to tap into some of her speed potential.

Motivation is our word of the season. She has got to want to move and do it willingly and lightly.

I promised Khaleesi (really myself) that today I would not push and nag. If she wanted to – and could -keep up with them it would be great. However if she wanted to drag her feet and choose to be the anchor then I would stick with her. She would come before the gps, and even before the possible new friendship we might make.

We met and said our hellos and headed out on the trail. A walking warm up the horses got to know each other a little and walked side by side when the path allowed. Khaleesi led to start (which was the only one of two times she would be in front of Eddy in almost 18 miles).

We did the climb up the steep way and it’s rough and rocky. Right as we approached the top I was lucky enough to see a back boot start rolling down the mountain behind us! I hopped off (actually a great spot for them to catch their breath) and went down for it. Sheesh- it really WAS steep. I was worried I’d go tumbling down on foot! At least it didn’t go too far. I took a picture looking up at the top.

She had basically stepped right out of the boot going straight uphill between the rocks. After putting the boot back on thankfully we had 100% boot success the remainder of the ride!

At the top we started to move and Eddy pulled out at a lovely ground covering trot. True to my word I picked up my energy and didn’t nag or beg- but Khaleesi moved into to her trot willingly and we got left slowly behind.

* She didn’t panic and the gap growing between her new trail friend and us. She didn’t try to move that fast, and I didn’t push her. Though I hope her pace increases, I am glad for the bright side that she is so stable and rhythmic and confident. She wasn’t a disaster trying to be something she was not on that day. Love her for that!

As I suspected she did have to pull back on crazy (not really- he was a nice horse!) Eddy. And she did for us. We found a pace that worked for us which in the trot is somewhere in the 6-8 mph range. It’s not exciting but she can keep it up for a long time. Right now it’s her efficient spot.

On this particular ride- the first time we began at the south end, but found it better afterword to start at the north end. Now Khaleesi seems to think the south end is the final destination so she perks up as we reach what truly is the half way point (the second time in our 18 miles she actually passed Eddy for a short stretch) and when we turn around (this is the second time riding this direction) she starts the turn around.

Now that I’ve stopped thinking of the turn around as a training issue and deal with it as a mental game we are doing better.

I am certain she is having a conversation with me- letting me know I am lost, we are going the wrong way, and she does not trust that I know what I’m doing.

While I hope in time to see less of this conversation, I do try to acknowledge her complaint and quickly head off the turn pulling her back on track and then pushing her forward in the right direction.

She eventually relents and gets with the program.

We trotted when we could. We walked when we got to icy spots or deep mud and gave the horses (Khaleesi really) a few walk breaks too. On the way back we even did some cantering.

Our new friend has a pretty impressive endurance record. She is one of the riders who go beyond the motto “To finish is to win” and for her “To win is actually to win”. She said she does the sport to excel and looks for the horse that will be likely to get her there and does what it takes to finish first if possible (and she has often done so) at least top 10. She is get serious or go home… Competitive type.

However I did not feel looked down on for having the goal to work within my current horse’s capability. For me the horse came before the sport. And I love her. Unless she tells me she hates endurance I will work together with her and we can be average in the pack but excellent together.

For me the challenge is to do our best, even if our best is to come in with the turtle prize sometimes.

It was a fantastic ride for Khaleesi and me. I lived up to my word and did not push her any faster than she was willing to move and though I did encourage her with my energy I did not push her with my legs, and of course (another bright side that some people with the fire breathing Arabians struggle with) I never had to hold her back to conserve energy. That struggle in itself can be draining on both the rider and horse.

In fact I most often trot her on a loose rein and find myself able to drop the reins for periods and balance with no hands and feel that float as she moves in that metronomic steady pace.

She did move willingly the entire ride and we finished with about a 5mph average which was respectable considering the mud and ice we came across and the steep up and down of the mountain to get to the trail. She looked great at the end of the ride as well.

I think we got a decent report… Khaleesi is not the type of horse she would look for to take top placings, but she told me she moved smoothly and efficiently, was sure footed, had a nice personality and a very metronome trot that didn’t waste a lot of energy. A pretty and solid mare with a good head on her. She felt we have a lot of work to do before our first ride in March.

I believe we are in good shape to finish though have no illusions of coming in competitively right now. I have built a great foundation with a lot of mountains and technical riding through our obstacle course trails. She is independent and confident and mentally in a great place to show up ready. She takes care of herself and eats and drinks well which is also important. We’ve been building up her bones, ligaments and tendons with long slow distance that will serve her in the long game.

Now we need to work on speed. That will come- especially now that I have some ideas on how to motivate her to pick it up.

Right now, we are in a good place!

Motivation

Saturday, February 6, 2016

I have spent much time and thought on the human-horse relationship lately. So much that I’ve even begun to question my own sanity and that point I’m pretty certain is well past the point others who know me have done the same.

It becomes obsessive- like a struggling teenage relationship… What do you think he meant when he said xxxx… Maybe what he really wants is xxxx…

Sometimes it seems hopeless. How will I ever decipher this horse world language? Honestly, if you archive my communication post you’ll see I’m not even that good at the subtleties of human language or the complexities of human relationships.

The best guidance I’ve gotten so far has been: don’t give up. This is a journey. There are no shortcuts.

What I’ve learned most recently is that if my mare is motivated she is amazing and when she is working against me she is also amazing- at arguing and defending her position.

I believe there is evidences that we have a solid relationship under us.

When my car or truck drives up at the barn, no matter where my horses are they make their way in short time to the gate and wait for me even if I have a few things to do- they stand there waiting as long as it takes. When I arrive at the gate they are both easy to halter. In fact my rule is they need to come to me- even if it’s just one step. They do 99% of the time.

Most times when I walk kahleesi back out and set her free she stays close- at least for a few minutes- and stands near me in no great hurry to walk off and roll or find her bale of hay.

I also believe she respects me and I know from riding together – and getting through a few tight moments together (as in challenging terrain, detours, mud, high river crossings) – she trusts me.

However a realationship is a living fluctuating thing and my challenge is in nurturing properly it every time we interact instead of assuming the foundation is there and that’s that forever.

One more piece of life advice I’ve learned from the barn. Never take your relationships for granted.

Where we are this week:

I’ve doubted in the past that Khaleesi is suited for or wants to be an endurance horse. She is a bit slower than I’d like in her trot speed and not all that ‘hot’ when it comes to getting down the trail. She often seems a little on the lazy side.

I kept telling myself to give her time to grow up mentally and physically before getting too concerned. She’s still young.

Last week I let her make some decisions on trail about where she wanted to go and a window opened up. She started floating down the trail.

I followed up that ride with one designed to let her make the choices as much as possible. She turned a 9 miles ride into a 14 mile one and though we’d struggled to average 5mph before and this ride (with no pushing from me) she effortlessly traveled 5.8mph (average). Not lazy.

Ok. Maybe she’s like the teenager in school who is smart but bored in subjects she doesn’t have interest in.

Or maybe she is a horse and I should stop comparing her to a human if I want to understand her 🙂

Susan and I then took a ride to find the lost boot and we let them set the pace. No pushing. Khaleesi was barefoot right after a trim so I knew she would slow down. Her feet are hard and in great shape but she has slightly dropped soles and tends to be slightly more tender footed than most barefoot horses. We had a very relaxed ride.

It was fantastic. We easily found the red boot and though she did walk somewhat slow, when footing was grassy and soft she volunteered to trot and we even cantered a stretch. Faygo was not at all barn sour. The horses and humans were clicking in sync. We averaged about 3.5 mph overall and enjoyed every minute.

The next day we hauled them off and let them take us home. I wanted to see if we could motivate Khaleesi by letting her jog home and also pick up our speed.

It worked. It was our fastest speed on a ride that long this fall/winter. Without one push from me, Khaleesi led the way home (we kept it that way on purpose) trotting many long stretches at 6 -7 mph easily.

I was able to really think about my center and while trotting set down the reins and alternate an arm over my head to feel balance (again from the Sally swift book). I thought about my diagonals and how one often feels easier than the other. It was lovely.

Susan was able to keep Faygo in her easy gait for longer and longer periods as well. Again, horses and humans were clicking on the same page. After about 10 miles we had an average speed around 5.5mph.

The ride wasn’t without adventure either!

With big rains and a snow melt the Jackson river was up and rushing. My concern was for my trail dogs- our trusty companions. The first crossing is the highest but there is a hanging pedestrian bridge. Of course I couldn’t convince the dogs to take the bridge without us, so Susan had to drag them across safely as I ponied Faygo from Khaleesi. The water was high! It was fun to cross and we had no trouble but my boots did get a bit wet!

One more time Khaleesi took me through what could have been a stressful situation as the current was moving. But she is rarely afraid and willingly goes wherever I ask. She did great here!

The next crossing isn’t as bad but still had some current. Linus (my little coyote dog) got across no problem but poor Peggy Sue (city dog learning to be a country girl) got a little lost in the current. Upon crossing I immediately jumped off to go help her but thankfully she found land before I even handed my reins over.

Sussn crossing the second time calling for Peggy Sue caught in the current.

The third crossing was the easiest and both dogs made the incredible journey safely in the end.

On the ride I thought over what to do with this information.

After a few rides where I involved Khaleesi in the decisions of how fast and where we went she was right there with me- and she loaded so nicely on the trailer again too. Our tacking up loose lead was 14 minutes – and I was really taking my time with her to wait quietly in between steps. She still walks off but it’s always improving.

Partially tacked- the man who cares for the barn horses was there while we did this last week and once as she walked off on me he laughed (good naturedly) and said “You’re gonna have to catch that horse to saddle her- Good God why dont you have her tied?”

In the past I might have tried to ‘train’ this by continually making her move better riding from home or when she doesn’t feel like it. I think now I want to use what I’ve learned to choose rides that she will enjoy and push herself when I want to condition more speed. And I will know that she may be slower and in no hurry on rides from home and use them to climb the mountain and add distance (or have more leisurely rides with friends) and not worry about speed.

One thing I know is she IS motivated on event day. The excitement and all the other horses are big motivation for her. It’s been training her for that day that’s had me concerned. I need to be sure she is ready to move the speeds she’ll want to in the event.

I’ve also noticed that our disagreements are a little better. We are going to have to work together and that means sometimes I make the decision. A couple times on the ride I choose a way she didn’t want to go- she did try to turn me around but just her head- we didn’t get full circle- so not as bad. She made herself known- then she seemed to accept my choice and went more willingly.

Seems like great triumphs- I’m so smart, leaning how to work with my horse. Building this great relationship. Look at me go.

Yeah. Then I screw it all up.
Even worse because I KNOW BETTER.

I am embarrassed to write this but this blog is my journal of the journey in truth and for better and for worse.

So I’ll tell you what happened when I put my goals ahead of my relationship.

Far from barn sour, my horses may have been heading toward home but the closer they got the more relaxed they became (yes- even Faygo). They didn’t seem particularly worn out and tired (I have seen that before) they weren’t breathing hard, they were just slowing down, a relaxed pace.

What’s going on here… Especially Faygo… They usually speed up so close to home… Why are they both keying down instead of up?

In the last few miles I saw our mileage average dropping… We were now at 4.8.

The data. The numbers. That is how we track things… Improvement… What works. What didn’t. We did so well today!

That little button in my head switched. I listened to the data voice. I forgot my horse doesn’t care about the data.

My energy changed. As we got closer I would ask for little sections to move forward. She would do it- we got sloppy. She would trot a bit then slam on the brakes and walk. I would lose my center. When she did offer some speed it was more out of impatience than willingness and she’d be in a hurry than slip in a soft spot. Faygo started getting the off-kilter energy I was sending and in an area Khaleesi decided to move out Faygo rushed her and Khaleesi shook her head and tried to kick at her- she then slipped as the footing was soft and regained balance. This irritated her more and she shook her head and danced. I had to circle her and ask Faygo to go ahead (we don’t do kicking). We walked the remaining half mile slowly and better in control.

I remembered myself and saw what I’d done.

The girls had ridden close together, cantered together, and had no issues for the entire day. It was only when I lost my right as ‘sane leader’ that she took matters into her own feet to tell Faygo off. Or maybe I was still the leader- but I was leading us both in that ugly direction.

Either way I knew I had taken a beautiful ride and ended it on a negative note.

How could I do that? I know better. Have I really learned nothing?

Well we got back to the barn and gave them a snack while we unsaddled. I told her I was sorry I let us down and that she had done so great in that ride. When I turned her out she walked away, took a roll, the got up and spun around bucked her back feet high into the air and ran up to the hay bale without a look back.

Our relationship is always in flux- thankfully that also means I can go back and do better. She has a generous heart and I think we can work it out.

Tomorrow we start fresh once again.

And I will be better.

Don’t give up on me… I won’t give up on you.

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Monday was cold and rainy. A good day to take a barn break- do some actual work – and let the horse have a non-human day to just be horses.

Tuesday was overcast and damp. I dragged my feet getting things done in the house and found a million excuses not to go to the barn through the morning.

Not only was the weather uninspiring but I was feeling a little foggy from my experience on Sunday. Usually pretty sure of myself (even if I have to change direction) I had more questions than answers and felt lost at sea when it came to what next.

Maybe I should just work on my paperwork today… What would I do? Ride? Groundwork? Relationship building? How?

Ok- you’re an endurance rider now. Not only does that mean you ride in crappy rather if it’s the day you have to ride, but also you have to get back out there and find some answers. You don’t give up because you don’t know what to do- you put one foot in front of the other and you go to the barn and say “hello girls- I’m not sure what the plan is today but let’s figure it out together.”

Since when has a plan actually been the best choice for the day anyway.

So I went.

Thankfully Khaleesi and Faygo still came to wait at the gate for me. If they’d have walked across the field away from me I think I would have given up and gone home.

Khaleesi avoided me slightly – she let me know that she’d prefer me to just bring some lunch and leave it there for her. She wasn’t very interested in the halter and going in to the barn for whatever I had in mind today.

I hear you girl- but we can’t give up. Don’t give up on me and I won’t give up on you.

I did leave lunch for Faygo who was sweet and grateful (not to have to work today). Khaleesi let me halter her when she realized that was the deal and we walked a halfhearted dance to the barn together. A little forward, a little back… faster and slower… yep. We got this part.

Meanwhile the plan was forming.

I have to follow up on Sunday somehow. I wasn’t able to let her do her own thing completely, but she was so happy and did so well when she was able to express herself. How do I create an opportunity for her to be able to feel like she is making choices- yet still work within a framework I can accept? She is wonderful and fun to ride when she’s motivated. How do I find some motivation for her?

I think she was telling me she didn’t want to go in the trailer, and that she wanted to go home.

Plan: I will trailer her just up the road to the recreation area, and then I will let her take me home from there, much like the ride we enjoyed together on Saturday with Susan- only then we took a very long way through the mountain trails. There are a lot of ‘roads’ home from there. Most are a fun short ride. I will let her choose the way home!

We started the process to saddle up standing in place.

This about took every bit of my patience today. I didn’t time us, and truly it was probably only 15-20 minutes but with each step she would walk off. After a few times just putting her a few steps back in place I went farther and would back her until she was backing quickly and well and then put her back in place (extra work). The process did improve as we went and after putting her in place I would wait on her to be sure she truly was in the mindset to stand still again and I did a lot of rubbing her or just standing with her (which I think she prefers to the rubbing) quietly to reward her for standing in place.

I believe she knew what her job was, and she was telling me she wasn’t interested in it today. It reminds me of the vet that came to look at her in the fall- thought she was quite a nice horse and in her words “very opinionated”.

Once ready to go we walked out to the trailer. Just a few weeks ago I have video of her sailing right on faster than I could keep up with her. Today I had to work to get her on. She dodged and avoided more than usual.

I drove especially carefully in case I’d been careless lately and that might be part of it. We unloaded, tightened up, took the bit and I got on. Then I said “Ok – lets go!” and allowed her to start out on the road most directly toward home.

We are now on the same page.

Each time we came to a choice on the route I tried not to influence too much with my seat or eyes and just allowed her to go the way she wanted. She was that lovely mare I enjoy so much- forward moving, happy, and no arguments. Most of her choices made sense…… until the one that didn’t.

We were within inches of a main trail that was a great route home and pretty direct. She stopped and asked to turn right into the woods instead. Just through some trees that direction is another path that we could have taken also to get to that grassy trail home- but she got on that path and started heading back toward the road we’d left a while back. This was vaguely in the direction home (as the crow flies) but by my human brain it was backtracking.

Ok- what are you doing here? I’m still with you! Let’s go.

She picked up speed and eventually before hitting that lower trail we went into the open woods! I have to admit she did a pretty good job of navigating the woods so I wasn’t clotheslined by too many trees- and we ended up on a deer trail that paralleled the lower trail (I kept my GPS going to be sure I at least knew where we were). When we got very close to the trail I suggested to her we get on it so it would be easier for me. She agreed to that and picked up speed again heading faster and faster for a long driveway that went right by my house. NOT the barn- my house, which is about a mile from the barn- on the highway.

Ok- I can’t let her take us home on the highway. Just not safe.

I encouraged her to pop off the gravel road where we’d end up in my front yard (still as the crow flies in the direction of the barn) and she wasn’t thrilled but went along. Here I tied her up in my front yard and put the dogs in the house while she munched on my grass. I wasn’t planning to hit the highway- but at this point I wasn’t sure what the route home would be and thought it better to leave the dogs out of the mix for the last part.

Now what?

It tickled me a bit that instead of to the barn she brought ME home. But I don’t think she realized that was what she was doing. She’d been to my house one time and we’d come at it from a different direction- that was not an option- the trails were very compromised (we’d ridden them to see how bad they were, and they were bad) and in the snowy-icy-muddy condition the detours would be downright dangerous today.

We were in a place where “you can’t get there from here”. So much for our quick easy ride today.

I suggested heading back toward the driveway and she began but kept asking to head North (barn direction- crow flies) and I knew that was a bad choice- but I let her try a handful of times. Each time we hit a briar patch, a laurel thicket, or a cliff (thankfully each time she seemed to realize this was not an option and turned back).

After enough trial and error we hit the driveway again and started backtracking- at a fast trot. It seemed she agreed this was the best choice. We went all the way up where the road turns to wooded forest road and I knew there was another connecting trail that we could cut back toward those grassy roads and get back on the good route home. She seemed to understand and hit her fast trot then a little canter- right past the trail head.

This trailhead is hard to find. I can usually get it when I’m really looking and it’s a decent trail once you’re on it, but it’s not very obvious and slightly overgrown. I had my GPS and knew we’d passed it, but again- where was she going to go? At some point she slowed and stopped. She stood there for a moment as if in thought. I waited.

I suggested turning around and she did.

Walking back down the trail we were both looking to the right. I checked my GPS and we had a ways to go backtracking to pick up the trail. She was impatient and headed once again in to the woods.

It was less obvious once in the woods where we’d pick up the trail and I was trying to work together so I asked her for the direction I knew was better… we ended up in some circles as the woods were more dense and I pushed her back to the road so we could pick up the trail just a few yards down more easily.

Now we were in for an argument.

She went from a joy to ride to turning me around pulling her head and fighting me. However this time I insisted.

We circled, argued, and get a few feet at a time until we reached the trailhead where she seemed to see it, say “Oh… This is what I was looking for anyway” and picked it up at a good clip.

I felt like I’d just been fighting with my husband over directions on a road trip (except my husband and I don’t usually fight) then we saw what we were looking for and were all fine immediately.

This trail is in fair shape but overgrown with some light bushes. She was eager at this point and I had to hold her back as she was ready to gallop through the bushes and mud if I let her. Even so, we were going fast- and I noticed that if the footing truly wasn’t good she slowed herself down- so I trusted her when I could to choose as quickly as was safe.

(of course I can remember seeing her leaping and running around the field and busting her ass in the mud, then getting up and looking around wondering if anyone noticed her ungraceful crash… I thought my own human ‘adult’ sense should help with the safety factor at least a touch)

Now we were on a roll. She was on the best path home and she knew it. The entire ride had been at a great pace and the trails and footing in this area are overall good- a little muddy ground to take care of, but they are rarely traveled so we didn’t slip much. With a few exceptions I asked her not to canter. I wanted us to have the discipline of staying to a trot- and if she wanted speed she would need to stretch her trot, which she did.

At one point when I did allow her to canter up a grassy hill I looked down to see we’d lost a boot bottom. [I believe this is due to the same adjustment reason we lost the previous one- and I know how to keep it from happening in the future but it’s possible my adjustment on some of the others from before might still give way. I don’t want to take them all apart- so I’d been trying to keep watch.]

I decided not to go back for it at the moment. She was so forward and we’d been doing so well with this experiment of letting her express herself, I didn’t think she’d understand backtracking for the sake of a hoof boot, and I know the area of trail it’s on and believe we can go back and have a good chance of recovering it Friday. I was choosing my battles.

We had a fantastic rest of the ride. She was moving out well and everything was right. I felt like an amazing rider when we were not expending energy arguing. She made it effortless, our transitions were so much better, the saddle felt perfect, I was able to think much more about my riding and changing diagonals as well as practicing posting trot, a balanced 2 point, and even experimented with the sitting trot with my hips being more open to move with her back laterally to make it easier on her and me (something I’d read in my Sally Swift book).

I thought some might have said she was being ‘barn sour’ and wondered if I was encouraging that ‘bad habit’. I don’t believe so. In fact there were times as we got closer to home she slowed on her own to walk a stretch (a great forward walk), and when we came to the woods I’d taken her in to practice our serpentines around trees, she went off the trail again and we weaved through the open woods parallel to the trail on her choice- and not overly fast. Very close to home there is one hill ALL horses want to charge up, and she pulled her head down and shook it as if to start that charge and I told her “no, please, you can trot but not bolt” and she softened instead and trotted nicely.

The closer we got to home in fact the more she seemed to slow down and relax. She even stopped a few times to listen and smell the air when were at the last switchbacks down to the highway. She walked across the road and onto the property completely relaxed and it might have been the best ride together we’d ever had. Without me ever pushing her for speed we rode 14 miles at an average pace of 5.8mph- and it was effortless riding. In the end she had almost no sweat, and only once after a canter was she breathing hard.

We were in alignment and working as a team, but not completely. The few times I had to step in and suggest the better path she fought me. We had the same end goal, but it seems she didn’t really trust me.

I’m so glad I got out there and took another step, but now I have more questions…

Did allowing her to make choices that didn’t work out the best (ending up and my house, coming upon briars and cliffs, and chaving to backtrack) teach her that she might not always have the best answers? In the moment she fought against me to find the trail- then I led her to it- did she realize that sometimes I can HELP us toward our goals? Do horses think and reason in that way?

I’m not really sure. But I still believe it was a worthwhile experiment.

What can I learn from this? Does she feel like I’m always forcing her to do things she doesn’t really want to do? Does she feel that her opinions don’t matter at all in our ‘partnership’? Always going on rides she doesn’t want to take? Can I find more ways to set up my rides that she is more motivated to participate? Would she be more willing to partner with me if we found some common ground in the process?

One thing I can say with certainty: I love riding her when her heart and head are in it with me. She is athletic and fun and smart. I hate fighting with her. She is strong willed and pushes to communicate when she is NOT happy with our plan.

I have to find a way to work in better partnership- a new kind of partnership. As Buck said: the trick is to make what you want the horse’s idea; or another mentor of mine put it: you can never put your goals ahead of your relationship.

Somehow I think the key to this puzzle does lie within our relationship- which I thought was pretty good. I’m not so sure now.

I’d like to get to know you

Sunday, January 31, 2016

I have been thinking about the human-horse relationship more and more lately. I used to think training was about getting the horse to do what you want/need, hopefully in a gentle way but the point was… Well… Obedience. It would be a bonus if that would also equal willingness.

Kind of like a big dog.

Obedience training.

tacked up ready to go- i removed the flaps from the saddle and love it even more now!

Stand still to mount… Side pass… Move out of my space… Stand still for the farrier… Walk when I say walk and trot when I ask for trot… Always stop when I ask (on a dime would be best)… Oh- and load on the trailer upon command too if you don’t mind.

Everything there is important. Also there are safety issues if you don’t have ‘control’. But…

Control of what?

I think…

this could change… I’m still sorting it out

…I used to think ‘control’ of your horse obviously.

But now I am starting to thinkthat it is more ‘control’ of your relationship. Lead partner in the dance.

I hear people talk about the partnership all the time- but I don’t think I really understood (understand?) what that means.

The more you know… The more you see you don’t know.

So I’ll say first that riding lately has been wonderful in the snowy mountains and the horses are both doing well with more mindful time with them.

Susan and I had a brilliant 15 mile ride over the weekend where we tacked up loose lead and really made an effort to be present in the horses’ world. We tossed out the watch and did everything with as much time as it took to not rush the process.

The ride Saturday was a big climb and since we still had enough snow to be a factor slowing us down I thought it would be a great ride to condition slow hills, muscles etc.

Early in the ride both horses stopped at a water crossing and didn’t drink. Just stood there.

Susan is even more goal oriented than I am- she asked if we should ‘move along?’ I said hold on- it was interesting to me that both horses were not moving or drinking on their own.

Khaleesi was yawning and licking and chewing (a lot) and Faygo looked like she was in a trance- breathing a little hard but not bad- we had started to climb a little.

I was looking for the change.

Khaleesi did it first. She went from standing and yawning to nosing around for dry leaves in the low water. Susan asked ‘go now?’

No… Hold on… See Faygo is still in that trance. Let’s wait for a change in her…

Thank god the friends riding with me have patience.

Then it happened- Faygo ‘woke up’ and on her own started to move forward.

So we went along.

I don’t know what that was about, but we had all the time in the world and it was interesting to me to see that play out. We passed other water crossings and they didn’t stop at one of them in that way the rest of the ride.

After about 10 miles Susan and I talked about what an amazing ride it had been. Both horses were willing and forward and neither of us had arguments. It was the best ride yet since we started riding together (and none of them had been bad).

The next day I’d had plans to meet a local endurance rider who I knew would challenge khaleesi to move out. She had a lot of experience and a racing ‘pony’ but I’d heard she would also be happy to have someone to ride with and not ‘leave us in the dust’. I wasn’t sure how it would go but I was looking forward to meeting her.

The snow cancelled our plan (for her) and though I was disappointed- I know you always get the ride you need – that was not our ride today for a reason- and I decided to trailer Khaleesi to hidden valley for a lovely fun fast ride together. Just the two of us.

I feel like I’m struggling to pick up her speed. I read about all these other riders and their horses who ‘eat up the trail’ and that 5mph average speed is what they consider LSD (long slow distance). If I push Khaleesi we can average 5mph but what I love about her is that she’s solid, not spooky or fearful, and not really ‘hot’… However this also shows up in her laid back work ethic (or so I’ve thought).

I know she’s young so I try to keep my doubts to myself but wonder sometimes: is she cut out for this? Or would she rather live a dressage horse’s life? She always seemed to love our time at pam’s in the arena learning things together.

So Sunday I intended to make it a shorter ride and see if we could pick up some speed. More trotting than walking. Get her cardio up- maybe even build a sweat. She hasn’t been challenged much in our rides these recent months. Faygo is a great training partner but her physical limitations make the rides a work out for her and yet Khaleesi doesn’t breathe hard or break a sweat.

It started really well and she seemed to happily trot out the trail from the parking lot that borders the river and a snow covered field. This is exactly what I’d hoped for. And she was moving well without me having to ask.

Joy.

And we kept on this way walking and trotting until a section of trail about 3 miles in when she kept looking up to the left.

“What is it? Deer? Yes I saw some deer… A smell? A sound?”

Then she got more serious and tried to turn me around (here we go again…)

I assume that her turning around is because she is lazy and doesn’t want to go for a ride. She wants to go back to the barn or trailer.

How can a lazy horse do endurance?!

So back to training & obedience right?

No- we aren’t turning around. This is our ride today. We’ve been here before (but not very often).

But this time I was more curious. That relationship thing … Horse time… The view from their eyes…

So I decided to wait.

I let her stop on the trail but I did not let her turn around.

She would yawn…lick and chew… Stand still… Sometimes try to turn around (I would ask her not to turn facing the other way though we spent most of that time crosswise on the trail).

I waited more.

The dogs got confused- came back and sat down next to us inquisitively.

Sometimes she would put her head around and rub my shoe with her nose.

How long can she wait here?

I slowed myself down and looked at the sun coming through the trees and I listened to the stillness of winter.

I reflected a moment on how I’m always on the move and don’t take time to be still enough.

I heard her breathing the deep breaths when she’s laying down in the sun I’ve heard before. Slow and deep.

And after 10 minutes she did not move from that spot and I thought it would be fascinating to see if we would stay here for hours or all night but I just can’t go that far. I wanted to wait her out but my watch won this time and in part against my better judgement I asked her to please keep moving.

She did- we were so low energy by now it was just a relaxed walk, and she asked to turn around 3 more times and I said no.

Eventually we regained energy and trotted off and kept a nice pace again. She did not seem agitated or unhappy.

On our way back to the trailer lot there are beautiful fields and she picked up this wonderful trot that was about 9mph (I looked because it’s unusual for her to trot that fast yet) and it seemed effortless. These are the moments I think she can really do this

Then she broke into a little controlled canter and as we approached the gate to the road (then just a short distance to the trailer) she slammed on the brakes (sooner than she needed!)

She seemed to want to avoid the gate. (We’ve been through plenty of times) and as I asked her to go ahead (and she did without fuss after that)- we headed back to the trailer.

Good right? My horses always love to get back to the trailer and eat some hay and go home.

She stopped – seemed to almost shy and slowed her pace as we approached (ok- good to walk in…) and as I let the reins go to grab my GPS I realized she took a wide berth around the trailer in a huge circle.

I didn’t ‘correct her’ and move her to the trailer (I’m sure I would have before) but she was walking nicely so I just let the reins lay and wondered what she would do.

She walked right past and toward the trailhead- but turned instead toward the B&B. She walked right across a low cement bridge that she will cross but doesn’t usually like to because of the rushing water sound.

Then she walked off the path and over to the fence and started eating some grass.

So we hung out there a while and ate grass (I ate my granola bar). Eventually I asked her if we could go back to the trailer now?

She seemed to say ok- and we headed back across the bridge (funny how she was more ‘spooky’ about it when it was my idea.)

But again I let the reins down and she turned instead back to the trailhead NOT the trailer.

Ok? Now what? I’m game- what do you want to do now? What are you trying to tell me?

So she cut through the snow field and completely on her own picked up a lovely slow trot.

Ok girl. I’m listening.

We trotted without stopping over a mile back where over we had gone first that day. She stopped to walk at one point looking for the dogs (we’d left the behind but not terribly) after they had caught up she picked up again and kept trotting only she chose a different route (we did not get to the spot she stopped on the trail earlier) and headed on the direction that could (on a long ride day) take us all the way home.

The river crossing for that was high with ice on the edges.

We’re not doing this today. She did stop on her own and seemed unsure about the icy edges.

At that point I said to her (yes, I spoke out loud to my horse not sure at all if she understands human English but it’s all I had at the moment.)

I’m not truly sure I understand you- but I appreciate you giving me a chance. We can’t go that way today- and we do have to get home before dark so we need to go back to the trailer. Can you work with me on this?

We turned around and every little path that went down toward the river she would try to take- we took one and she seemed satisfied that this was not the best way (dead end).

I did get her back to the trailer but she was not as forward. She wanted to turn around a couple times but I told her no. We can’t.

When we got back to the trailhead she had added 4 miles to the 6 we’d done the first loop. Our average speed was 4.8 mph including the slow walking we’d done after her 10 minute stop. I got off and walked with her the last yards and rubbed her and told her how great a ride that was and what a fantastic horse she is.

She ate hay and did not seem stressed at the trailer as we untacked. She sidestepped the trailer the first try and then walked on pretty nicely the second.

On the drive home I felt different. I felt as if we’d communicated something between us for the first time ever. I was part of a moment when she trusted me enough and I trusted her enough to be honest and I said “ok, I’m listening”.

It was like being invited into a secret world for a brief visit and we were different for that time. I loved when she was forward and trotting out and seemed to know just what she was doing but not ‘out of control’ either. I felt like she was talking to me for the first time (though I know they communicate all the time- this was different somehow).

What I am reflecting on after this ride are a few loose questions. In no particular order:

Have I underestimated the complexity of thought, personality and preferences my horse has going on? Do I assume too much that I understand her? She wants food… She is lazy and doesn’t want to work… She wants to go back to the trailer… Today one thing I found was that she is not slow or lazy. She moved beautifully and when we got to the trailer – even if she wanted to go home she seemed ready to trot another 10 miles on top of the 10 we’d just done to get there on her own 4 feet. That isn’t lazy.

What was she saying? Was it a concise message I didn’t get or was it just fun to be able to make her own choices for a brief time and a fun random jaunt?

Is there something about the trailer? She’s not particularly afraid of loading, but is there something annoyong? more noise lately? Maybe I should have the tire pressure checked… Did we hit some curves too fast or bad bumps from the winter weather that makes her not like it?

How do I listen to her and get to know her and still stay the leader in the dance? She may have wanted to jog home on her own 4 feet but that wasn’t possible that day. Sometimes she may not want to go out in trail- but we all have to do some things we don’t want and obviously turning us around on trail is not a discussion I want to have every ride. When are we having an appropriate conversation and when is she now in control? I don’t want (nor is it safe) to have a horse who doesn’t pay attention to me or respect me. At the same time I don’t want an obedient robot.

This reminds me of a fellow blogger who posted about a rescue dog that came to them with perfect command obedience. She said it was uncomfortable (robotic?) and thankfully in life with them the dog relaxed a bit and was well mannered but seemed to be able to express himself and have a personality as well. I ride a horse and not a dirt bike because I want the personality and relationship.

I don’t want to ride a robot horse but I need to lead the dance.

Now what?

How a year changes things.

Sunday, January 23, 2016

Last winter I spent a lot of time riding Faygo and ponying Khaleesi along to help build her fitness. I used to nickname her ‘the anchor’ (not a great nickname for an endurance horse in training I suppose).

Pictures from last year ponying Khaleesi:
Today was the first time I rode Khaleesi and ponyied Faygo.

We just finished with a 2-day snow storm that hit the entire north and central mid-east with a beautiful layer of snow. We ended up with barely over a foot which is perfect for a good snow ride- and when the sun came out on day 3 with temps around 30 I gladly got out of the house and headed to the barn.

I decided to bring in both horses for a mash (beet pulp and grain) and some attention. I let Faygo relax with some hay and worked on new ideas I’d picked up while re-watching another of Buck’s videos during the snow-in.

It seemed ridiculously simple. Ask for a back up of a few steps- then change to a move over by pushing at the air by her head-neck. I know we can back up, and if I walk into her head space while leading she moves away and makes room for me to circle while she pivots around. This seemed *almost* the same. Might as well try it.

We had the back up just fine- but she just stood there as I pushed my palms into her head “airspace” as if I was an alien she did not understand.

Huh.

I am always amazed at how something so similar to a thing we DO know can be completely foreign.

So I did the next suggested step and pushed gently into her by her jaw. She actually moved toward me- barely- not aggressively but either slightly frustrated or confused.

Eventually as I persisted she got it and stepped over. Then we relaxed and tried again. She picked it up pretty quickly after that but it was interesting how she had to learn that separately from move out of my space when leading.

We then worked with clicking to move toward me. We ONLY click (or cluck or kiss) to ask her to move toward me.

Again- she knows this when I stand away from her and click to her to walk forward toward me. I click to her when I ask her to come stand at the stool for me. She does that pretty well. I’ve also started tapping her shoulder to move it toward me with clicking sounds. She does ok- we get at least one step toward me right now and then move on to something else.

Today (feeling ambitious) I thought I’d try the hind. So I would tap her hip gently with two finger and click. She tried everything except move toward me. When she at least was moving her hind I released and thought it over….

How can I help… Give her a clue…

The next time I moved the lead rope under her neck to her far side and loosely left it around her hind with no pressure.

Started tapping and clicking again. She wasn’t sure what to do and when she started to move her front I gently put pressure on the rope which had the effect of asking her head to move away and led her to step her back foot just an inch toward me- I let go of the rope and rubbed her neck.

Great job- you are so smart!

I let her think a few minutes (she was in think mode) and when she was done we did some review of easy things for a couple minutes.

Then I tried another angle. I had her near the barn wall- so moving away from me was a hard choice- and asked her to shift her weight on the rear leg to the foot away from me. Then I clicked and tapped at her hip and she shifted and stepped an inch toward me again- knowing her weight was on the foot away from me made the shift toward me more likely.

We stopped there for the time and did a few simple review things again; then I put her in place for tacking up- loose lead.

Did we do better today? Let’s see:

2:03pm: Standing in place with the pad (that took 0 minutes)
2:09pm: saddle set in place. I had to play around with the pad as I wasn’t happy with the placement and that did not help. She fidgeted a decent amount but we got through it.

2:13pm: girth at first hole on each side. She was much improved here.

2:16pm: breast collar is on and more holes tightened. She was visibly relaxed as we went through this.

2:18pm: up to 3rd hole on each side. Ready to give her a break while I grab her head stall and get ready to roll.
2:38pm: we are mounted and ready. bit still poses no issue. Stood more quickly at the stool and still for mounting. I can’t say if I took the same amount of time in the break. That is when I make sure I have water, set my GPS, last bathroom break, grab my riding gloves and other last misc. things.
Last try (Thursday) we were at just under 60 minutes. Today was 35 minutes. And the process was noticibly easier.

This is worth keeping up with!

Because I couldn’t bear to leave Faygo behind we decided to take her along. It was a nice 5 miles walking in the snow. Faygo is easier to pony than Khaleesi was a year ago.

It was everything I love about a good winter ride: beautiful, quiet, peaceful and still. The dogs hopped along happily through the snow as well.

As for my saddle- I haven’t said much as the riding hasn’t been perfect for getting comfortable in a new seat. We can’t move out much in the ice and frozen ground- so I’m doing a lot more walking. Everything new takes some getting used to and though I always liked it I needed a little time to settle in- and I’m not quite sure yet what length my stirrups will work best at…

I think it fits her great. And today I really started to feel settled into the seat. It’s comfortable, secure and I do love it! I am sure we will find our sweet spot as we get more time in it together.

It was fun to remember a year ago when our roles were reversed. Khaleesi did really well today as the lead horse and though she can still throw a tantrum and threaten to kick horses that invade her space (though I never allow it I know it’s still possible from time to time) she was tolerant of Faygo and they were fun to have out together.

Faygo’s only issue was in thinking she should be able to take the lead heading home. I suppose she wanted to pony me. Not how it works dear.

Overall a great experience and always feel blessed to have such a great pair of horses.

Stay warm out there!

Snow day gift

Friday, January 22, 2016

As I lingered under the covers Thursday morning I thought about how pretty and mild the day was forecasted to be. The one day of the week I was booked solid from 9am-7:30pm. I grabbed my phone to check morning emails without climbing out of the covers even for coffee to learn that due to impending weather everything was cancelled. A snow day with no snow!

What a gift!

I had a ton of work to catch up on so I decided to dig in and wait to spend any barn time until later in the day- it would also be the warmest then.

It wasn’t until after 2:30pm that I was able to get to the barn. I was conflicted as to how to use my time. We’ve had cold weather and more alone time recently and I was a little bored with short loops and training around the yard. I didn’t really have enough time to put in a lot of miles.

I have sensed lately that Khaleesi isn’t really paying attention to me. It’s been gnawing at me since I sent a video of us working to a friend and she said as much after watching us.

I looked back. It was true.

We were getting things ‘right’- she moves nicely with me when we walk, she’ll stand at the stool now, but it’s like a teenager in a class they are bored with yawning as they give the answer with a ‘yeah yeah yeah I know… But what’s for lunch today‘ kind of attitude.

She’s not really focused. Not on me at least. I wasn’t really that important to her lately.

Maybe we should do groundwork?

No… It’s too pretty of a day for that… Come on!

I don’t know what we’re going to accomplish riding for 2 hours… Not speed, not mileage, seems like a waste of time- we should do something worthwhile.

I often don’t have an exact plan when I walk out to the field. It sort of develops as we go and see where she is and where I am that day.

Somehow it came together.

When I walked out the girls were at the end of the pasture. Just standing in the sun not close to each other. They could have been napping.

I decided to ignore them at first and check out their hay stash and run in shed. (Honestly you are already short on time- you should grab your horse and get moving!)

Horses wake up and start walking over to me (this is not a waste of time- today we are going to be excellent at every step – and pretend like we have all day… That is the plan now. Even if we don’t ride. We are going to focus on every single step today)

I let them find me. Khaleesi walks into the shed and takes a bite of hay. I ignore her and walk toward the gate a few steps. She is curious. I don’t look at her but try to use body language to invite her to follow me.

She does. I can hear her a few steps behind me.

She is paying attention to me.

I get her closer to the gate and reach back to rub her neck. She stands there and I put on her halter. We walk out together and she leads nicely to the barn. We (as always now) change speeds and back up and even do some circles to be sure we are connected.

In the barn I give her a snack of beet pulp (wet to encourage hydration in the winter when they are prone to drink less), omega (supplement and feed) and show and pleasure pellets- with salt on top- again to encourage drinking. As she eats I brush her off and formulate the plan.

We are going back to the basics today. We will ride if we can, but I have gotten lazy lately: tacking her up while she is distracted by eating. I’m going to ask her to stand still while I work around her and tack up and if it takes the entire time I have at least we will have worked on something valuable.

This skill- being able to saddle up while she stands quietly, lead rope draped over my arm- is very valuable for our endurance training. At vet checks this would be a great skill to cultivate considering we often don’t have anything to tie to, I often don’t have a crew handy and there’s not always someone to hold your horse when you need. We are going to get serous about this skill this winter. And it will demand her to focus.

One reason I have been lazy about letting her eat while grooming and saddling is that she gets snippy sometimes. She’ll tell me she doesn’t like that… Cinching up or putting on the breast collar or rubbing her with a cloth… It’s not serious but she needs to learn (as Buck says) “to live with that.” It isn’t hurting you- you are going to have to be ok with this process.

So I brought out all I would need and asked her to stand next to the saddle horse and every time she moved a foot I calmly put her back in place. She moved a lot at first and also would try to block me with her head if I went to walk around her. I went slow and methodically. Each step I attained I took a picture to record the time.

3:08pm: Standing still in place and groomed to go.
3:14pm: took 6 minutes to stay in place, rub her, place the pad and stay standing still.
3:21pm: 7 minutes to get her standing still in place to set the saddle on her back.

3:31pm: 10 minutes to get the girth to the first hole on each side. She is not great with this part and she stepped off more than once. She even nipped her teeth in my direction once- to this I immediately backed her half way down the barn aisle and then brought her back in place. After that she stood much better.

NOTE: I do not beloved she is in any pain with this and the saddle fits. It’s a habit and an attitude. There are times if she’s eating and distracted she doesn’t even register that she’s being tightened up. After I get it on loosely- she is usually pretty easy to tighten up. So I do not believe this is her crying out for help or in any pain.

3:36pm: breastcollar. I now also tighten one hole here and there on her cinch as I’m working. And rub her and just stand with her quietly too.
3:45pm: bit and headstall. Before the bit I tied her back up, put a few apple treats in her dish as a reward/break and did a few last things as I went to get the bit out of the warm tack room. She was good at taking the bit and it didn’t take but a minute once I put her back in place.
3:53pm: 12 minutes working on standing at the stool. She was not good here- she would step her hind away and walk off. It took a while to get her to stand still in place and then be sure she was paying attention to me before I tried to get on.
3:57pm: finally mounted and she stood still while I got out my camera and reset my GPS.
4pm: walking out to the trail. It took almost an hour to saddle, tack and mount properly. We don’t have that kind of time at the vet check!
After all that I had about an hour left to ride. The ground is hard and frozen slick in many places. I decided to work on getting a good walk.

She did seem more into the ride and she argued less about going out. She only tried the turn around about 3 times and each time I caught it before she could get her head around and pushed that hind end back onto the right track. She isn’t trying with as much force now. It’s a halfhearted effort (that is progress!)

We had a great 4.25 mile ride. I now call these training rides as opposed to conditioning rides but I know both are valuable.

I wonder if my horse friends & readers can tack their horses without tying (and asking the horse to stand quietly withou fidgeting)… Does everyone else already do this? Or would it be a challenge for others as well?

I am going to get back into this habit again as I believe it made a big difference in our relationship during the ride. Has anyone else made this a priority? Let me know- I’m curious. Have you tried it? Is it easy for you? Make a comment here if you have (or haven’t).

Do tell…